Esther de Jonge
Maybe you recognize yourself in this. You have carried a lot for a long time. You are used to pushing through, taking care of what needs to be done and adapting to what others need from you. From the outside, you may still be doing remarkably well. But somewhere along the way, you have lost the connection with yourself.
Underneath it all, you may be dealing with chronic stress, burnout or high-functioning burnout (still functioning, but running on empty).
But carrying too much for too long is not the only way we can lose ourselves.
Grief and loss can also bring you to a very different and challenging place. You may have lost someone you love, your work, your sense of identity, or the future you thought you had. Loss can change how you experience yourself and your life.
Finding your way back to yourself is not about becoming someone else. It is about reconnecting with who you are, while becoming more aware of what has shaped you along the way.
Our early experiences of attachment play an important part in this. They shape how we relate to ourselves and others, how we respond to stress and how we navigate connection, loss and change. I don’t believe you need to be fixed. But patterns that once helped you adapt don’t always have to keep leading the way.
On a personal note: I am curious by nature and love learning, discovering new things and gaining new insights. I genuinely care about the person in front of me and what matters to them. I enjoy depth and can be very serious, but I love laughing and having fun just as much. I am intuitive, tend to pick up on things quickly and am not afraid to take the lead when needed. I have a pretty good inner compass and, most of the time, I’m not afraid to follow it — while knowing I don’t always get it right.
I work both indoors and outdoors in nature, and sometimes alongside my horses, Arya and Milan. They bring their own quiet and honest presence to the work, while always having the freedom to participate or not.
At the heart of my work are three things: safety, connection and autonomy. Ultimately, this work is about experiencing more of these within yourself and in your relationships with others — and having more freedom to live and lead from who you truly are.
My practice is based in the Rotterdam area in the Netherlands, and I also work online.
